Home Alone

Keeping children safe when you’re not there

It’s midafternoon on a summer day. Your preteen children are engrossed in an activity, and you need to run to the store. Do you dare leave them alone for an hour?

When to leave children alone is a question millions of parents face—whether it’s an occasional quick errand or regular after-school hours when parents are still at work. In all cases, proper preparation is key.

Step 1— Evaluate your child’s maturity level

“Are your children comfortable being alone? Do they follow directions and have good judgment? You want to help them grow and become more independent, yet be safe and not in over their heads,” says Mary Stahl-Levick, M.D., pediatrician with Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network.

Pennsylvania does not have a legal age for children to be left alone. The generally accepted minimum is 12 or 13—if your child is dependable. That depends on such factors as the child’s personality, birth order and social maturity.

“You are ultimately responsible for your children’s safety and well-being,” says Sergeant Henry Hamory, crime prevention officer for the Allentown Police Department. “If your child is easily frightened or doesn’t talk about fears or concerns, or if you live in a high-crime area, it’s probably not a good idea to leave him alone.”

Step 2 — Prepare your child

“You should feel confident your son or daughter could handle any situation,” Hamory says. “Be clear in your expectations. Set rules about what they can and cannot do. Teach them what to do in an emergency. Be sure they know how to reach you or another adult by phone, and have them check in with you regularly.”

Hamory advises that you tell your children: “Don’t answer the door or phone unless you know who it is. Screen calls with an answering machine or caller ID, and never tell someone you’re home alone.” The child also should know how to dial 911 or the emergency number in your area, and what to say.

Once the rules are set, practice how your child would react to various situations: What would you do if you smelled smoke or had a power outage? What if you got locked out? How would you handle boredom or loneliness, or an argument between siblings? “Rehearse anything you think could possibly come up,” Hamory advises.

Step 3 — Set the stage

Get to know your neighbors. “You and they should know what’s going on in the neighborhood and report anything suspicious to the police,” Hamory says. “Someday your kids might need help in an emergency. Another day, you might be there to help someone else’s children.”

Step 4 — Do a dry run

Start with a 15- to 30-minute trip that’s close by, Stahl-Levick suggests, and stay in touch by cell phone. Gradually lengthen the time you’re away.

Stahl-Levick admits her husband was able to take the plunge before she was, leaving their three teen-agers while he went to pick up pizza. “I realized the house didn’t burn down and no one got kidnapped,” she says. “It’s best to ease into it, but it does get easier—until they start driving.”

Want to Know More? Click here for a “Home Alone Safety Checklist” or for a book list for parents call 610-402-CARE.

ARTICLE TOOLS: